I’ve been blogging for 5 months now, and I think I kind of need a break.

So that’s exactly what I’m going to do for now.

I know I just disappeared from the face of the earth blog for a little over half a month. 

Back story: Was sick for two weeks, then decided to go and do something big.

What is that something big?

Well, I’m still working on it, but you will probably hear from me again about it…

Maybe 1-2 months later.

Hold your horses!

So please don’t unsubscribe from this blog, because that “big thing” is really going to be cool.

I promise.

If you have any questions, I’m finally releasing my email address into the wild. Really, if you have any questions, email me at:

amandakoh01 [at] gmail [dot] com

More Goodies

Thanks for reading so far down.

And here’s some good news.

Though I’m taking a break from this blog, I’m definitely not taking a break from you guys.

If you need accountability for a goal you are planning to accomplish, I’ll be your accountability partner if you wish. (Yes, I do have permission from my parents to engage in such one-on-one work)

If you’re interested and want more details, just email me. Once again, my email is

amandakoh01 [at] gmail [dot] com

As I’m writing this, I am going to start some sessions with one of you (you there? ). I am SO excited for this opportunity!

That’s it for today.

Please stay around for the big news coming!

But even without this blog producing new content, you have to work on your goals! Don’t slack.

Wishing you the best in your life,
Amanda

. He has written a great post on how to cope with anxiety. It focuses of the fear of change, but in my opinion, it applies to all causes of anxiety. Enjoy, and please leave a comment!

As I am an owner of Long Island Real Estate that I rent out, I encounter many of my tenants who are fearful of change.

It is normal to be afraid of change.

We all desire security and comfort that a routine and familiar surroundings provide.

I understand why this fear served to protect early man when there was a great deal more danger in the world, and why it still protects you and I today. Fear is only a problem when it overwhelmingly asserts itself in response to small threats.

We all want to feel comfortable and secure in our daily environments. We feel more in our element with enough money, healthy food, and a nice place to live.

Do you feel disrupted and insecure when you move to a new house? Do you know why? The reason is: your routines and comfort zone are violated.

It is normal for you to feel anxious or worried sometimes. These feelings can become much worse when your life changes dramatically, all because of your fear instinct. This is a common response if your security and safety are threatened.

Impacts of Anxiety

Your anxiety becomes a problem when it makes you react negatively. Anxiety that does not cease can tremendously impact your health, life, and job.

If it is relentless, anxiety can create depression, insomnia, and other health concerns that force you to seek medical help.

If you do not deal with such ongoing stress, your body’s hormones will continue to press your adrenaline system into overdrive until it quits, and your blood pressure could become high enough to negatively impact your kidneys and heart.

Relating to Situations that Cause You Anxiety

I confess that once I had enough anxiety where I became frustrated, dissatisfied, and even homesick.

My symptoms were those of a little panic attack and included hot flushes and nausea.

At the time, I had undergone a major life change that included a new apartment far away from my family.

Thankfully, I dealt with these emotions swiftly. You should learn skills to cope with anxiety should you find that you suffer from similar experiences.

Coping With Your Anxiety

There are several things you can do to help you cope with your anxiety. Here are some examples.

1) Express Your Feelings

The main thing is for you to express your feelings by writing in a journal or talking them out.

For some of you, you could be strong enough to handle it alone. For those who can’t handle it alone, sometimes a family member or friend can hear you out and support you through the hard times.

Remember, there is no shame in admitting to anxiety and fear when your environment changes, because it is only human – other people also do experience anxiety!

Express your feelings. Journal, or tell someone you trust.

2) Exercise to Burn Adrenaline

Another thing you can do is exercise. It is the best way to burn adrenaline.

Why burn adrenaline? Anxiety makes your adrenaline levels rise dramatically. If you don’t burn this adrenaline, you’ll feel nervous, frustrated and angry.

It only takes twenty minutes per day to do this effectively.

This helps to break your mind’s cycle of anxiety.

After exercising:

• Your body relaxes
• Your mind clears
• Your attitude turns positive

I can confess to feeling anxious from time to time since I bought my own Long Island Real Estate. Working around the house – especially mowing the lawn – helps to use up the anxiety-fueled adrenaline for me.

3) Alter Your Environment

There are things that you can do to improve a new environment. Here are some examples:

• Re-decorate your new place to help reduce stress.
  This is an especially good idea if you are moving into a place that is not yet fully furnished. The empty space will only aggravate the sense of loss of your old familiar home and friends and family who are missing.
• Make whatever personal touches you can to encourage feelings of security and contentment.
  For example, you could put some pictures of your family and friends up in rooms where you find yourself spending the most time.
• Invite your friends and family over.
  These new happy memories will help you to settle in to the new home.

4) Be Optimistic

But the big question is: How do you become optimistic?

1. Distinguish between your actual situation and the feelings inside. The feelings and thoughts can only hurt you if you let them.
2. Discover some great stress relieving exercises, like meditating, cognitive behavioral therapy, or visualizing.

I can tell you, having been there, that you will get through this.

If you keep a positive outlook and attitude, then it will happen faster. In the end, when you learn to accept change willingly, you will have conquered your own gnawing fears, as well as grown tremendously as a person.

Let’s recap for a while.

What can you do to cope with anxiety? Mainly, there are four:

• Expressing yourself – journal, or tell someone you trust
• Exercise regularly – 20 minutes daily should do the trick. Keep busy with chores as well
• Decorate up your house
• Be optimistic

And here’s something you might not know: Cold showers actually help to relieve anxiety!

These should all help with the stress and anxiety. This is particularly important if you find yourself without family, friends, or even roommates around as a support network.

In the end though, all of these solutions may not eliminate your fear and stress and its underlying factors.

When you have tried all of these ideas to relieve or manage your stress and fear and find that they have not helped you out considerably, there is one more option:

The Last Resort: Get a Trained Professional

First of all, there is no shame in you going to see a trained professional if stress is creating negative impacts for you.

These professionals will assist you in learning what the root causes of your problems are.

With a doctor helping you, it may not take very long to get to the bottom of your problems.

Warped ideas and convictions that are negative will impact each and every part of your life. The problem is that anxiety can become a self destructive and reinforcing cycle if you do not address it.

Have You Been There Before?

Here’s a quick question: have you been there before? Moving, then feeling anxious?

Hopefully, this post has given you some ideas on how to better cope with your anxiety if it happens again.

Leave a comment and tell me about your experience!

Sam Marquit is a entrepreneur, home improvement specialist, and part time blogger. Fee free to visit Sam’s blog on how to add value to both home and life, and don’t forget to connect with him @fmarquitv.

This is the second post in the series ‘Handbook for Life’. In the first, we talked about improving yourself. Today, we’ll talk about productivity.

Do you feel overwhelmed by all the tasks you have to complete? Do you feel that the 24 hours provided to you daily is too little?

Well, this can all change, by applying 50 simple and effective ways to be more productive, or, as Lifehacker would say it: productivity hacks!

I came up with these 50, with the help of more than 20 other posts, improving ideas and making them shine. And here is the final list…

Here’s a teaser of some of the tips:

• What’s productivity?
• Plan, plan, plan
• Multi-task!
• Time boxing

But here’s a quick note: Sometimes these hacks are for getting more time into your day. I still call them productivity. Will you?

Do you feel like this?

And like with the previous Handbook for Life post on improving self, here’s a mini “crash-course” with some inspiring quotes to set the mood…

Efficiency is doing things right; effectiveness is doing the right things. ~Peter Drucker

Time is the scarcest resource and unless it is managed nothing else can be managed. ~Peter Drucker

Lost time is never found again. ~Benjamin Franklin

You may delay, but time will not. ~Benjamin Franklin

Productivity is never an accident. It is always the result of a commitment to excellence, intelligent planning, and focused effort. ~Paul J. Meyer

So, were you inspired? I hope so. Now let’s get to the meat of the post!

Picture: Justin Scott Campbell

First Up

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Without these, you will probably never be able to be very productive.

1. What?
   First things first. What does productivity mean to you? One easy way to do so is to split it into smaller words…I’ll share my meaning in the eBook, so stay tuned.
2. Why?
   Why do you want to be productive? To save time? Then why do you want to save time? To spend more time with your family? Why? Keep asking yourself ‘Why’. Which value is it that makes you want to be productive? (E.g. it can be family)
3. Stop procrastinating on important things! The biggest killer of time, in my opinion. Here’s an awesome post on Litemind: Overcoming Procrastination Instantly Using Self Talk (Trust me, it works)
4. Get organised
   Organise your files – online and offline. Organise your life. Simply. Do you want to organise your room? Well, this how-to is quite simple!
5. Automate
   I’m not exactly someone you should go for automation tips…so check out this post.

Picture: Thomas Leth-Olsen

General

Here are some quick tips that will hopefully make you more productive. If you’re lucky.

1. Stop the TV!
2. Add 10 minutes to the clock
3. Go offline. Switch off the Interenet.
4. Use password tools such as LastPass. Now one of my accounts have the password W9ca9OS0oR (with one letter changed just in case someone hacks my account…!).
5. Sleep more at night! You’ll wake up feeling refreshed
6. Eat. But not too much.
7. Exercise!
8. Quit. I love this blog on quitting.
9. Create your time log
10. Have quick naps – they will boost your productivity
11. It’s proven that listening to music will boost your productivity. So do.

Picture: aussiegall

Tasks

Do you rely on post-its for your tasks? Or are your to-dos all around the place – your desk, your inbox, your task manager?

1. Why?
   Why do you want to complete this task? Motivation is essential now. Without a why, there’s no want to do it.
2. Create a to-do list
   And make this list the place where everything is stored!
3. Separate personal from work
   Why do I recommend this? Well, if you have a regular 9-5 job, then you will be focusing on work tasks in those 8 hours. So separate, and get focused!
4. Use deadlines
   Do you know the Parkinson’s Law? Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion. This is why deadlines are important. Otherwise, you’ll never get anything done.
5. Prioritise!!!
   The most important thing ever, after the task itself and its deadline. Which should you do first?
   

Picture: thebarrowboy

Do Those Tasks!

Do you just take out your list, your tools, then leave it alone?

1. Big Rock
   I really like the Big Rock concept, from Steven Covey’s book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I haven’t read that book yet, though. Find out more about the concept.
   
2. Hardest task first
   After you’ve done your big rock, I recommend doing the hardest tasks first.
3. Time Box
   I first learnt about time boxing from this cool post.
4. Make use of commuting time
   How often do you commute? I don’t know about you, but I commute really really often. Make use of your commuting time and do small tasks then!
5. Single task on important things and multi task on unimportant things
   From this post - The solution is to multi-task the small things and single-task the big things.
   
6. Use incentives!
   Incentives motivate you. Motivation lets you do faster. Productivity!
7. Adapt the Pomodoro technique
   I say adapt because I believe you should alter the timings yourself, based on your own attention/focus span. (If you aren’t familar with the Pomorodo technique, check it out)

Picture: Jérôme

Distractions

There’s so much distraction lately. Social media. Email. Information. Phone…

General

1. Ignore
   Ignore all the distractions. Really. Just ignore.
2. Limit
   If you can’t ignore, limit. Give yourself a specific time only. Really.
3. Why?
   If nothing works, go back to basics. Why do you have this distraction? Is it a source of communication? What?
4. Simply Information Stream
   How many blogs or newsletters are you subscribed to? Can you unsubscribe from some?

Social Media

1. Quit
   Seriously. If the social media platform isn’t helping, just quit.
2. 10 minutes
   I use the 10 minutes rule every day. I only use Facebook (personal stuff) for 10 minutes. Maximum.
3. Once per day
   Set yourself a specific time each and every day to log on.
   
4. Unsubscribe
   Facebook gives email reminders. I don’t know about the rest. Just unsubscribe from those emails!

Email

1. Templates
   Make use of templates! If you find yourself writing something again and again, go make a template for it!
2. Reply later
   You can read an email now, but reply later, when you’re ready for it.
3. Batch reply
   Or maybe wait for when you have enough emails so you can do it quicker.
4. Specific times
   Give yourself specific times, for a specific length, for yourself to log into email. Maybe it’s 9am and 3pm for 1 hour each?
5. Pick up the phone
   Discussion takes a lot faster on the phone than email.

Picture: webtreats

Plan!

Google’s Master Plan? Kinda amusing. Sets the tone, doesn’t it?

1. Estimate the time
   How long do you think you will take to complete this task?
2. Outcomes
   What do you want to achieve? (Why?)
3. Plan daily – every night
4. Plan every week
5. Plan every month
6. Plan every year

PS: Go check out the VIP Newsletter to get an awesome book all about planning! (For those VIPs, go to the Toolkit page, enter the password, and download the book ‘Planning Person’.

Picture: Steve Jurvetson

Habits

A habit is like a chain. What do you think?

1. Stop being a perfectionist!
2. Create a minimalist workplace
3. Use lists – you may want to check out this post as well

Picture: Lali Masriera

Reflection

Has this list been helpful to your productivity? What are some of your other productivity hacks? Leave a comment below and I’ll get back to myself.

By the way, if you don’t do anything, you don’t get anything. So pick one of the 50 hacks above and start hacking your productivity!

Series picture: The Mooncake Box

Side note: If you really aren’t interested, please skip and come back next week (10th April) for an epic post on 50 ways to be more productive. Cheers!

Otherwise, let’s get on with this. I’ve just updated my newsletter on a number of aspects. Please take a look and see what I have to offer!

• Content
  • Based on the recent pretty popular post on 7 self-help resources you shouldn’t go without, I decided to create a new concept for the list, called Weekly Digest. They are emails I will send out every weekend highlighting some links and resources I’ve found.
  • If you want, I’ll send out the blog posts to your email inbox as well (there’s an option – I know some of you won’t like it, like me)
  • My old newsletter has been, well…pretty stale. I’ll be sending out at least one per week (the Weekly Digest). Sometimes more than that.
• Design
  • I’ve created personalised templates edited from ‘Designer Templates’ from Mailchimp
  • They’re really new
  • Pleasing to the eye
  • And you’re going to love it (I hope)
• Gifts (now, this is killer)
  • New, edited and re-designed!
  • I’ve added two new gifts - Planning Person (a short eBook on how to plan) and Mensa Personality Quiz (an Excel workbook to help you find out your personality).
  • Everything has been edited – really.
  • Now, the design is more in sync – same design. It’ll be easier to read on the go, with a smaller column, and bigger font size, as well as a nicer font!
• Free, unlimited, one-on-one email coaching and lots more bonuses! (I’m not joking about this)
  • You’ll have my email. And I have dedication. So if you just email me with a question, I’ll reply to your email (within 48 hours).
  • The bonuses? Well, I’ll tell you more about it once you sign up – there are 3!

So, this is just what you’ll get. Please check out this page if you’re interested in finding more.

Now let me get out of here. (And trust me, the next post will be truly epic.)

The first post of a series, 'Welcome to the Library', on links you shouldn't miss.

I’ve chanced upon many amazing resources (not only links!) on self-help. I’ve decided to share these resources with you.

But as I wrote the post, I decided it was getting too…messy. So I decided to split them up into different posts, under the series ‘Welcome to the Library’ (WTTL).

Today, I’m going to share links – articles/posts, webinars, and challenges – whatever is on the web that I love.

• A free webinar on the topic of habits
• 99 awesome short stories for you to think
• A simple 30-day challenge I encourage you to join (and it’s by someone I highly respect)
• and more!

So… read on.

1) 40 Life Questions – Pictorial Format

This is question 7 on the list...

I’m going to kick start this list with an awesome list of questions, in pictorial format. 

What better way to ask yourself questions than with awesome, nice pictures?

I don’t think there’s any better way. So go find a partner right now, go to this post, then answer – very honestly – the 40 questions everyone is afraid to ask.

Share what you want. Keep what you want private.

You’ll love the pictures and questions, I swear!

Found your partner already? Great, get started now!

2) FREE Webinar on Habits (by Leo Babauta)

Do you know this person - Leo Babauta?

Next, let’s go into habits.

Do you know Leo Babauta? I highly think so. He’s the founder of popular blog Zen Habits, with over 250,000 subscribers/readers.

And, as one person in that number, I got his article on a free webinar in my RRS feed (and immediately saved it to Pocket).

I’m going to watch the full webinar soon, but I’ve watched parts of it and I must say – it is awesome.

If you’re struggling with habits, I highly recommend you take about 1.5 hours out of your time to listen to him.

His webinar is titled “How I Used the Power of Bad Habits to Change My Life” and it’s a really high recommendation.

Go check it out and learn about Leo’s struggle with bad habits, why bad habits are so powerful, how he used the principles that make bad habits stick to beat them, and finally how to apply these same principles to forming good habits.

3) Brian Tracy’s Goal Setting for Success! Challenge

Wanna join me?

Do you follow his work? If you do, you’ll probably know about his success he has experienced by helping millions of people to set and achieve goals. Here is a quotation from the article promoting the challenge:

The one thing I’ve discovered in over 30 years of researching success patterns is that a person of average intelligence who has the ability set clear goals, and has the discipline to maintain a goal-achieving mindset is 90% more likely to succeed than a genius without a plan.

What most people don’t realize is that creating an effective, logical plan is absolutely crucial to achieve goals for success. There are specific, proven steps that, if followed, work everywhere, for everyone, in virtually every country, no matter what your education, experience, or background may be when you begin.

He is holding a 30 Day Goals Challenge where you will pursue your own goals with other like-minded people, as well as a video clip from him including tips on how to achieve your goal and a motivational boost every week!

Furthermore, there are awesome prizes up for grabs!

I’m participating in the challenge, and it’ll be interesting to see how I manage to manage my time, with my blog and studying at the same time!

So here’s your chance to work side by side — neck and neck — with Brian Tracy, his team, and other likeminded, goal-oriented individuals. Go join the challenge (it’s absolutely FREE!) and I hope to see you there in the 30 days!

4) 99 Inspiring, Sad and Thoughtful Stories

Now, let’s make ourselves think.

Sometimes the most random everyday encounters force us to stop and rethink the truths and perceptions we have ingrained in our minds. These encounters are educationally priceless. They spawn moments of deep thought and self-reflection that challenge the status quo and help us evolve as sensible individuals.

Below you will find a selection of 99 tiny, thought-provoking life stories recently submitted to our sister site, Makes Me Think (MMT). These are simple, powerful, real life stories written by the people who lived them.

I recently chanced upon the Marc and Angel Hack Life blog and I immediately subscribed via RSS. And as you probably know, you’ll usually get some of the recent posts on the blog marked ‘Unread’. As I really liked the recent posts, I left it as it is (usually I don’t read them all) and took my time to read.

Anyway, this post caught my attention. It’s an epic, long post (over 8,000 words) that took me over 30 minutes to read, reflect and cry.

I especially liked: #4, #15, #22, #30, #32, #43, #59, #64, #71, #80 and #86. But I highly recommend you read through all of them, because they really are inspiring.

So check out this awesome post: 99 Tiny Stories to Make You Think, Smile and Cry. I guarantee you you’ll love it!

5) Enhance Your Life in 30 Ways

Let’s go improve ourselves now…

Do you have 30 minutes to spare? You do? Well, great.

You can start on one of the 30 life-enhancing things in less than 30 minutes.

I realize some of these suggestions may lead to activities and projects that will likely take longer than 30 minutes to complete; but they still take far less than 30 minutes to start. So go ahead and do the hardest part, use the next 30 minutes to START, and then pick up where you left off tomorrow.

There are seriously a lot of links and resources in this epic post.

Go check it out.

6) Can You Tell Yourself These 12 Things?

And finally, as a review…

Hopefully you can, but even if you can’t, it’s not a problem (follow my blog and you will soon be able to!)

These are 12 awesome things you should be able to tell yourself. Can you?

7) Extra! (Paid) – Life Changing 30BBM

There is also a paid product I want to recommend. No affiliate link, just a shout out to the awesome program.

I attended this challenge in August last year and it was life-changing. Now, the person behind it, Celestine Chua, has improved it a lot and made it into an eBook.

I haven’t read it (no money ) but I recommend you to check it out and if you like what you see, go and buy it!

For a limited time, there’s a 15% discount, and it will go for $36, otherwise it will go at $42. (US dollars) The valued price of the product is $511, including live runs every year, starting May this year (next month!)

Go and check it out – Be a Better Me in 30 Days!

The End

Thanks for reading! Have these 8 resources inspired you? Did I miss out anything? Feel free to share in the comments below!

By the way, here’s a poll. The next post will be chosen by YOU! Go vote:

Series Picture: Stewart (library background) and Enokson (welcome sign)

Do you want to improve any part of your life? Whether it’s communication, study, or anything at all, this post is for you.

But you aren’t alone! I know that, because I’ve been facing a problem since I was 7. That is four years already. But I have been improving it, although I’m not satisfied yet.

And how have I improved it? Well, it’s with the help of some awesome people near me. Specifically, it’s my teacher and one of my best friends, Arielle.

The Problem

Have you read my previous post on how to succeed (work hard)? Then I think you know what it is.

Anyway, the problem is my Chinese. Whether it’s composition, comprehension, listening comprehension, oral… Name it, it’s bad.

And it stems out from on thing.

The Root Reason

Chinese wasn’t in my “nature”. I excelled in English – because I spoke English whenever I communicated with my friends and families. Even during Chinese lessons, I might speak in English (most of the times with the person seating next to me)

Then I thought of the people who excelled in their Chinese. They shared one simple characteristic: they surrounded themselves in Chinese every day – read Chinese books, did assessment books, researched, and more!

In fact, I also realised that those who excelled in Math (uh… one of them is me) surrounded themselves with Math. They solved Math problems every day, researched on Math stuff, and learnt more outside our curriculum.

Then I Knew It

How could I improve my Chinese? Well, simple.

Other than working hard, I had to surround myself with Chinese. And how should I do it? I asked the people who were good in Chinese one simple question:

What do you do every day that contributes to your Chinese studies?

The results? Some answers that came in was:

• I read Chinese books every day.
• I do assessment books daily.

…and so on.

More Problems

• I didn’t have many Chinese books. All of them in my hours have been read over 10 times (seriously).
• Assessment books? Nope. I do a lot of them, but they haven’t helped.

Then, I really ran out of ideas.

I was frustrated. Stuck. Irritated. I blamed myself.

You are stupid! Some people can get 10 more marks than you! Why can’t you? Why do you keep getting low marks?

What could I do? I seeked help.

Seeking Help: A Creative Solution

Guess who I seeked help from?

My Chinese teacher. But not this year’s teacher though. I couldn’t trust her.

I seeked help from my Chinese teacher last year. Why? She…

• knew I was weak
• gave me help
• never looked down on me
• encouraged, inspired and motivated me
• gave me confidence
• still did everything in the list above this year, even when I am not her student

I knew I could trust her.

So I asked her for help.

She told me (in Chinese, of course),

Talk to your friends in Chinese every day, during recess, class, after school. Any time you talk, talk in Chinese.

Nobody suggested this at all. It was an amazing strategy.

Implementing the Advice

I then thought of who I could start off with. Then I remembered.

There was one person in my class who was great in Chinese. And this person is one of my best friends. We lent each other hands: she lent me a hand when I needed help, and I always lent her a hand when she needed help.

This time, I needed help. I approached her, told her about my situation in two sentences, then I asked if over email, we speak in Chinese.

She agreed.

Since then, we have exchanged over 50 emails in 15 days. My vocabulary has widened, my composition marks have improved, and out of five comprehension questions, I didn’t get a single one wrong (usually I got about 3 wrong).

The End of my Story (But Not This Post)

So…that’s my story. Has it been inspiring? Motivating? Do you want to receive a step by step guide on how to improve any area of your life?

Well, I’ve decided to make a ‘how-to’ guide. Below is the actionable stuff. And I mean it. I’ve actually dissected what I did into seven simple steps, with actions you can take straightaway.

Yes, you’ve read about 750 words already, but I’m focused on giving epic posts now. And if the story and the steps I took isn’t epic, I don’t know what is.

If you really want to improve yourself, read on. Otherwise, you can press the back button now.

…

Still here? Great. So let’s get straight into it.

Step 1 – Define the Problem

If I had one hour to save the world, I would spend the first 55 minutes analysing the problem and then 5 minutes on the solutions.

~ Albert Einstein

Before you do anything, you have to know exactly what the problem is. It’s not enough to know a vague idea – you need a crystal clear idea.

So what is the problem in this step? Because it is so simple, many people skip it. This is the theory where people skip simple but essential steps – because they seem to easy.

But it really is essential. How are you supposed to solve a problem you don’t know?

Here is an awesome how-to guide on defining a problem.

Step 2 – The Root Reason

What is the root reason of your problem? Delve into it.

Like Celestine said on her post Address Root Cause vs. Effects, it’s like just using a mower to mow the weeds in your garden rather than removing the weed by the root!

The takeaway from the post is – don’t just solve the surface problem, because more problems will just come out.

Go deep, tackle the root reason. Grab the roots and pull them up. The next time you’ll be bothered by the problem will be a long time later!

Read her post to help you find the root reason of your problem.

Step 3 – Analyse Others

Do you have any friends who are good in the topic?

• If you want to improve your communication skills, do you have any friends who communicate well?
• If you want to blog better, do you have any friends who have a successful blog?
• etc.

Do you get what I mean? If you can’t seem to find someone, try to be more specific. If you still can’t, be less specific.

It’ll be good if you can find at least two or three people so that results will be accurate.

Anyway, your next steps would be:

• Find similarities between them
• Find differences between them and you
• Look for what they are doing that you aren’t

Step 4 – Seek Help

Now you know your problem, your root reason and some possible steps to go about improving the area, you can ask for help.

Why ask for help when you already know what to do? The answer is – it might not work for you.

So find someone that you know well and is quite an “expert” in the area. Someone you can trust. Here is a sample script of what you might say. Alter it to suit your needs, and the medium of communication you’re using.

[Greeting]. As you know, I am [very bad/poor/need help with AREA]. I am thankful for your help previously [say real stuff]. Anyway, I need more help. [Explain your problem]. Do you have any suggestions?

So go find someone you can ask help from.

Step 5 – Approach

Almost all the time, you need someone to help you. Sometimes they play a crucial part, sometimes it’s keeping you accountable.

But whatever it is, you usually need (or want) someone to be on your side, to know the problems you’re facing, to be able to talk about them openly.

So approach them. If they say no, let it be. They aren’t indebted to you – you can’t expect them to say yes to everything.

Here’s a sample script:

[Greeting]. [Explain the problem you're facing briefly]. I think you’ll be able to help me [request help]. If you can’t, just say and I’ll understand.

Step 6 – Implement (Action)

Only when you implement, you can get action.

• Be productive – by the way, the next epic post is on 50 ways to be more productive.
• Plan
• Review

Here’s another awesome post How to Take More Action on the Positivity Blog.

Step 7 – Results!

You will definitely get results. But what you’ll get depends on how hard you work and the strategy itself.

Whatever it is, you’d have worked hard. So for a while, do the 3Rs.

• Rest
• Reflect
• Review

Reflection

And that’s it!

It’s simple, isn’t it?

Remember, reading is not enough.

Following isn’t enough either.

Read. Take in. Use your mind. Change. Adapt. DO.

Picture: Porsche Brosseau and Alex Bellink

I almost failed. I almost cried. I almost gave up.

But I didn’t.

Guess what I’m referring to? – My Chinese composition marks.

I got 22 over 40. And seriously, it was my worst marks so far. I pushed the blame to other people first.

My teacher has such high expectations. It’s her fault, not mine.

Then another voice said this:

You’re kidding, right? It’s your fault. It’s not her fault. It’s your fault that you got low marks. It’s your fault that you are such a failure. It’s your fault.

Oh man. Now I was self-sabotaging myself! Then yet another voice piped up:

Yes, it’s your fault. But your fate is in your hands. Work hard. You’ll win.

And boy, did I work hard. I created a document with good sentences, idioms and characters that I want to use during the compositions. I did one practice composition every day.

I felt like this: falling into the water. But I got onto the board again, and rode the waves.

And boy, did I win – not. The next composition, I got 23. Not a big improvement. I felt depressed. I wanted to give up. My first voice told me:

You are almost killing yourself. But you didn’t win. What for?

The second voice said this:

I agree. What for? Just give up, can’t ya?

Then, the third voice piped up:

Seriously? Just work harder. I’m sure you will reap results in the long term.

And I did! I worked so hard. And I won.

Seriously.

My Third Try – The Results

When I saw my third composition’s marks, I was amazed.

28 out of 40.

The highest mark was 35 out of 40.

There is only a difference of 7 marks.

Finally, for the first time, all three voices told me the same thing:

Finally! Congrats. You’ve worked hard. You won. Now go and work harder. Go and win more.

And I’m going to.

In my hands right now, I have the fourth composition. Whether I win or not, it’s up to me.

And whether you win or not, it’s up to you.

So work harder.

By the way, please share your experiences with me in the comments below! What are your thoughts?

Picture: Aristocrats-hat

Gold cannot be pure, and people cannot be perfect. ~Chinese Proverb

Nobody is perfect.

You can never be perfect.

You can always improve yourself.

Here are 50 ways to help you do so! You’ll probably not be able to do all 50 at once, and that’s totally fine! But pick at least one that resonates with you and start improving yourself!

Feel the change. Improve.

First of all, I’d like to share with you some quotes on change, on improving yourself, and on perfectionism. Hopefully, they will inspire you to make your own changes in life.

Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without. ~Confucius, Analects

Once you accept the fact that you’re not perfect, then you develop some confidence. ~Rosalynn Carter

Unless I accept my faults I will most certainly doubt my virtues. ~Hugh Prather

We can change our lives. We can do, have, and be exactly what we wish. ~Anthony Robbins

There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self. ~Aldous Huxley

So just a mini ‘crash-course’. I hope they’ve inspired you!

Picture: Kr. B.

First Up

This is the foundation of your life. Without these changes, your life could actually crumble down. I recommend starting with these.

1. Define your life purpose: They are the ultimate guide for your life!
2. Find your values: They will guide you to make decisions in life
3. Be who you are: Don’t be a second-rate version of someone else
4. Smile: Everyone likes to see a genuine smile. Think about it: how do you feel when a complete stranger looks into your eyes and smiles?
5. Respect: Your elders. Your minors. Everyone. Treat everyone with the same level of respect you’ll give your grandfather.
6. Be patient: Treat everyone with the same level of patience you have with your baby brother.
7. Be polite: Say ‘Please’, and ‘Thank You’.

Picture: Untitled blue

Learn

Learn. Be wise. And remember to share.

1. Read a book every day: Books are wisdom. Read more. You’ll expose yourself to more wisdom. The personal development book I will recommend is The Magic of Thinking Big (since it’s the only book I’ve read so far!)
2. Read blog posts and apply tips: Blog posts are nothing if you just read. Don’t be a self help junkie. Read posts, take down notes, create action steps, then do those action steps! Implement the tips they give. Follow their technique for a while – does it work for you?
3. Start a life tracker: I’ll be writing about this in future. A life tracker is a book which contains the essentials of your life. It’ll help you live life to the fullest. It’s your life’s blueprint, or your life’s manual.
4. Write a letter to your future self: How is this got to do with learning? Well, you will be able to learn from your present self in the future. Write your experiences, your thoughts, your feelings, your goals, your action steps, and then seal it up (or use an online service) to open on a specific date.
5. Learn to listen: Listen, not talk. It’s tough.

Picture: white ribbons

Skills

Building a sandcastle takes skill and time. Upgrade your skills and learn new skills.

1. Level up your skills:You don’t have to learn new skills to improve. You can also level up your current skills. Are you a blogger or writer? Level up your writing skills! Are you a speaker? Level up your public engagement and public speaking skills!
2. Learn a new language: Learning a new language is a new skill itself. You’ll be able to acquaint yourself with a new language and a new culture, and it’s a whole new mind-opening experience. Try different languages than the ones you already know and speak.
3. Pick up a new recreational hobby: What are your favourite hobbies? Now look beyond them. Is there anything new you can pick up? Sewing? Cooking? Pottery? Dancing?
4. Pick up a new sport: And sport also. Why not try a new sport? Fencing? Golf? Rock climbing? Ice skating? Football?
5. Overcome your fears: This is a skill in itself as well. What are your fears? Fear is sometimes good for you, but too many and it becomes a problem. If you have a fear, it usually represents something you’ve yet to address, and addressing it will help you grow.
6. Get out of your comfort zone: Being too comfortable won’t help you grow. What is your comfort zone (what are you comfortable doing)? Shake your routine up. Do something different.
7. See things in a different perspective: When you have to make a decision, don’t stick to your original one. There are other perspectives to consider as well.
8. Say NO: We always say yes. And that’s a problem. Learn to say no with skill and art. Learn to make the other person fine by your decision.

Picture: Dave Carter

Habits

Habits are what you repeat again and again. There are bad habits, good habits. Let's pick one and kick them, or cultivate them.

1. Wake up early (or late): Are you a morning person, or a night owl? Whatever you are, adjust your sleeping times. It will help you improve your productivity and the quality of your life.
2. Keep a journal and write in it (at least once a day): You can use an online journal or an offline one, a fanciful one or just a very minimalist-type one. It’s yours, so choose what you like. You can also journal in it once a day, or multiple times a day. The main thing here is to gain better self-awareness – you’ll be able to clarify your thought processes.
3. Reflect daily and weekly: I use my journal for my daily reflections, and my life tracker (I’ll be posting more about this soon – either this month or next month) for my weekly reflections. Reflecting is a good way to remember what you’ve done with your day and week.
4. Watch less TV: I’m 11, and I can resist the TV. Why can’t you? I haven’t watched a single second of TV for about a month or so already, and it’s been a great experience! However, some TV programs are actually beneficial and have their own advantages. The best thing to do is limit your time. You don’t have to stop watching TV at all like me.
5. Meditate daily: You might already be doing this without noticing. Closing your eyes and letting your mind rest for a while is meditating. Lying on your back not thinking about anything is meditating. You can do long guided meditations, shorter ones, or just the ones I’ve mentioned above. They all help to clear the clutter in your mind.
6. Start a 30-day challenge monthly: Set a goal and give yourself 30 days to achieve this. Your goal can be to stick with a new habit, or do something you’ve always wanted to do. Why 30 days? It’s just enough time to strategise, plan, get into action, review and nail the goal.
7. Challenge others: Adding on to the previous point, competition is also one of the best ways to get motivated. Find a friend to do the same challenge as you and see who achieves the target first. And don’t be too competitive – share with your friend (and vice versa) your own tips.
8. Tell the TRUTH: Don’t lie.
9. Cultivate a good habit: I won’t be able to list down every habit, so just choose your own habit that you like and cultivate it!
10. Kick a bad habit: Similarly, I won’t be able to list down every single habit. What bad habits do you have? Start kicking it away!

Picture: Alex Lomix

Goals & Action

Walk up the stairs. Take action. Then you'll find success.

1. Set big goals: It’s not enough to set small tiny goals. Set big goals that stretch you beyond your normal capacity. Set big goals that you’ll feel absolutely at the top of the world once you achieve them. Set them, make a strategy, plan action steps, then start working on them.
2. Stay focused: With so many distractions on the Internet, you’ve gotta stay focused. Close Facebook. Close Twitter. Close your email. Close IM. Close all distractions, then start working.
3. Use to-do lists: What tasks do you want to complete today?  Write them down, then start working on it. Use a medium where you feel most comfortable and most convenient. Use computer all day? Get something on the computer. Use your phone instead? Get a phone app.
4. Identify your blind spots: Blind spots, in personal development terms, are things about ourselves we are unaware of. One method of doing this is identify everything that trigger your emotions (annoyance, weirdness or affectedness) in a day. These are your blind spots. Then work on steps to address them.
5. Ask for feedback: As much as you try to figure out all your blind spots, we won’t be able to find out all. Asking for feedback will give you an additional perspective.
6. Acknowledge your flaws: Everyone has flaws. Understand your flaws, acknowledge them, then address them. What are your flaws? What are the flaws you want to work on now? How are you going to address them?
7. Identify your strengths: What are your strengths? This isn’t meant to make you feel boastful. It’s meant to make you aware of your strengths so that you can ‘take advantage’ of them while doing a project.
8. Take a break: If you’ve been working hard and long, then take a break. If you’re feeling tired, you won’t be able to produce quality work. You can take a weekly break: schedule a block of time (I recommend an hour) every week and during that time, relax, rejuvenate and charge yourself up for what’s ahead.
9. Start a blog: By starting your own blog, you’ll be able to document your journey, and get some tips and encouragement from other people as well.You will also learn more skills, such as discipline, leadership, time management, and more.
10. Do your best every time: Excel at what you can do.

Picture: Nicola Whitaker

Friendship / People

True friendship. Love. Aah...

1. Do a random stranger a favour: You can buy the person behind you in Starbucks a free coffee. You can help the person who dropped his keys pick it up. You can help an old lady carry her bags. You’ll find that you will grow as a person when you do that.
2. Reach out to the people who hate you: Or maybe hate is a too strong word. Anyway, if you ever stand for something, you’ll have haters. Do you hate the people who hate you? It’s way more challenging to love them back, but, being able to forgive, let go and show love to these people will do you good. Reach out to those who hate you, show them love and seek a resolution. If they refuse to reciprocate, don’t worry. Love them all the same.
3. Say thanks: Did anyone help you in one way or another? Say thanks.
4. Learn from your friends: Everyone, including you and your friends, have amazing qualities in them. With all the friends surrounding you, there are many things you can learn from them. Think of one friend at a time, then ask yourself: what is one quality they have that I want to adopt?
5. Avoid negative people: Negative people will pull you down. Don’t spend too much time around them.
6. Learn to deal with difficult people: You just can’t avoid every single negative and difficult person, for example, at your workplace.  What do you do? Learn how to deal with them.
7. Reach out to people you admire: Whether it’s a celebrity, an A-List blogger, or a smaller blogger, reach out to them. For some, you might not get a reply, but you’ve tried your best. Then follow them on Twitter, Facebook or whatever you have, and engage in their material.
8. Over-deliver on all your promises: Slightly under-sell your capabilities at first so that you’ll be able to over-deliver later on. It’ll seem to others that you’re going habitually above and beyond the call of duty.
9. Compliment people who deserve it: Go out of your way to compliment the people who have gone out of their way to shine (see above point).
10. Share knowledge and information with others: Share your essential information openly with others. And they will probably share those they know with you.

Picture: Valetina Manjarrez

Reflection

I hope this list has been helpful! What are your own ways of improving yourself? By the way, I’ll be posting 9 other X ways to X posts like this post. I’ve not set in stone any topics yet. What do you want to see? Share with me in the comments below.

And a last word for today: you have to commit yourself to personal growth. Even with 50 items on this list on how to improve yourself, if you’ve no intention to take action, it doesn’t matter what I write. Nothing is going to get through. You’re the one who’s responsible for your own growth – not anyone else.

Now, kick off your self-improvement journey by picking one of the 50 ways above and start doing them.

By the way, what other ways can you think of? Share with me in the post below!

Many of the blogs online are pills of success.

But you won’t have guaranteed success even if you read the “pills of success”.

Well, just reading the blogs and their articles without doing anything is like buying your medicative pills (medicine), looking at it, but not eating it. You won’t get better just by buying and looking. And similarly, you won’t be successful just by finding (the blog) and reading.

But, if you buy your pills, look at it and eat it, you will (if there’s a cure) get better. How long will it take? It depends, but  you will.

And similarly, if you apply the tips you find in posts, you’ll be successful. It may take time, but you will.

These are your posts opened up in your web browser. But there's no mouth. Because you aren't eating them, you aren't making yourself well and succeed, you aren't learning from the posts. Just looking at them.

So What’s the Problem?

If you just find the blog and read the articles, then what are you? A self-help junkie.

A self-help junkie is someone who reads self-help books voraciously, attends seminars as much as his/her budget will allow, and is fluent in self-help lingo; however, when you look at this person’s life objectively, s/he has very little to show for this investment beyond a well-stocked bookshelf and a collection of motivational posters.

~ Steve Pavlina

A self-help junkie will always devour content – whatever content it is, whether it’s self-help books, seminars, blog posts, quotes or whatever you can think of. But they don’t do anything with regards to the content.

It’s like buying and looking at pills and expecting that to cure you.

Yes, the analogy may sound even crazier than a self-help junkie, but it’s the same concept.

Then why can’t you be a self-help junkie?

1) Waste of Time

You’re reading.

But you aren’t learning. You aren’t getting results.

What for?

You’ll continue your life as usual. You won’t be anything different.

But you’re investing lots and lots of hours into the reading of material.

Why are you wasting your time? Time is precious.

2) Self-Delusional Growth

Let me borrow a quote from Celestine Chua on self-delusional growth:

Self-help junkies think they’re working on their growth because they are gaining all these mental shifts and what not, but they are just bluffing themselves.

[...]

It’s time to ask where all the self-help knowledge you’ve learned is going. Our internal world and external world mirror each other and if there was truly inner growth, you don’t even need to talk about it. Your outer world will naturally reflect it.

~ Celestine Chua

3) Same Life from X Months/Years

You’ll never learn. You’ll never apply.

You’ll never change.

Your life will still be the sucky one from years ago.

Even after reading pages and pages of posts and books, after listening to hours and hours of audio recordings and seminars.

Types of Self-Help Junkies

There are various types of self-help junkies. As we go further, the character are worse. But if you share just one characteristic, you’re already in the warning zone.

Here are the three types, taken from Are You a Self-Help Junkie?, injected with a sense of humour.

1) I’m an Addict

• I frequent books, blogs and seminars
• I get motivated by these three stuff above
• I do the stuff
• It leads to positive life change
• But my excitement tapers off
• The change disappears…
• I’m back to where I started!
• I move on to the next resource. I’m lost.

2) I’m an Observer

• I read
• I acknowledge the concepts
• I can point out the wrong parts
• I don’t take action
• I read for fun
• I keep looking for new content wondering why there isn’t anything new
• Look at my life, there’s no result to see

3) I’m a Desperate Seeker

• I face a problem.
• Need self-help books, blogs and seminars!
• I turn to self-help anxiously for help
• An answer is given! A direction is pointed!
• Sorry, rejected.
• I need an answer! Help!
• An answer is given! A direction is pointed!
• Sorry, rejected.
• I look for the miracle answer and breakthrough solution

STOP Being a Self-Help Addict

In Is The Overload of Information Crushing You?, I shared how to deal with posts and eBooks.

From Is The Overload of Information Crushing You?

I still stand by this process.

In fact, I’ve actually gotten more than ten lessons and pointers from just four posts I love (I’m going to publish them soon, so watch this blog!).

But here are some more tips on how to stop being a self-help junkie:

1) Say No To Stuff That Have NO Value

When you say no, you’re not doing the taskbecause there’s no value.

And similarly, if the posts have no value to you, why read?

• You don’t have a blog and you don’t intend to create one: why read about traffic strategies?
• You’re making millions: why read about making your first dollar?
• You’ve already graduated from university: why read about multiplication sums?
• You don’t make excuses: why read about excusitis?
• You know the ESPER technique: why read about ESPER again?

And you get what I mean, don’t you?

2) Write Notes

Don’t just read.

• Write what you have learnt
• Write action steps going forward
• Write questions and ask the blog owner
• Answer your questions (if you know it after a while) on your blog if the niche is the same

3) Collate Your Favourite Posts

If you really really like the posts, put them together. If there are two posts on similar topics that you both really like, you can also (if using Evernote) merge the two notes together.

And why do this?

• If you need help in a particular area (e.g. I’m faced with a problem; I need to find out how to overcome it), you can easily find the post you need
• If you want some inspiration, you can easily get it
• If you’re a blogger and you want some ideas for posts, you can easily find them

I have a notebook in Evernote that I use to collate my favourite posts.

4) Apply

Writing notes and action steps is a step.

But until you apply those tips, and do those action steps, nothing is going to happen anyway.

So apply. Do. Execute.

(Be productive along the way as well!)

5) Share

Share with others your thoughts, your ideas via the comments if you’re reading a post. A review on Amazon if you’re reading a book. A question or a hand if you’re attending a seminar.

You might get some other ideas as well. More content. More learning. Better person.

Reflection

Remember, reading isn’t enough. Writing isn’t enough either.

Applying, doing and executing is enough.

But you can always do more.

No matter what.

So today, get a notebook (or create a document on the computer) for writing down notes. Sort them by category, author, whatever, just give yourself a space to write notes.

Start writing action steps. Start writing notes. Start writing tips.

Do them. Remember them. Apply them.

Oh, and share your thoughts in the comments below. I’ll share with you my thoughts as well.

Image courtesy of Harveyben

I wrote about it in my last post, but now I have decided to delete it. Why? Read on to find out more!

Anyway, GLB has changed a lot in the past few weeks. It has been a mad week, a hectic week and now I’m going to share with you these changes.

The most noticeable one would be the theme. I’m going to cover why I chose this theme…and more. It’s not only an announcement actually. Decision making skills were crucial here!

Change of Theme

I’ve switched to a new theme and I’m intending to use this for the whole of 2012. Maybe I’m going to switch next year, but like I said (and other famous people out there), change is constant.

Anyway, the reason why I chose this theme is because I’m actually a pretty fun person to be around with, and…well, a ‘colourful’ person. I love different colours and I believe they bring spice into life. This theme suits me perfectly!

And also, there’s going to be a bar below the search bar on top featuring my Social Media accounts. I haven’t set them up proper yet, so they’re not here as of now.

More Irregular Posting Schedules

From now on, I will not follow a strict posting schedule. Here’s a story.

I was frantic. I had no more time left on the computer (time limits) but I had to come up with a new post that will blow people away.

I quickly wrote a super quick post on my phone. I needed a list, but I didn’t have the knowledge. I went to an older post, copied the HTML, and edited the blanks.

Then, I accidentally clicked publish.

No editing, no proof-reading… BAHM! It was published, waiting in the email boxes on my subscribers and readers.

That post was actually the post on change. The quick tips on dealing with change were re-replaced by how to deal with problems. I don’t have any idea why, but I’m not going to blame anyone – not me, not WordPress (for Android), not anyone at all!

I want to give myself and other people a break. The first step of dealing with problems was to RELAX!

Anyway, so I asked myself: What am I doing? Is quantity that important?

Now, I’m not going to force myself to write two posts every week, because I want to focus on creating quality content, or epic sh*t as Corbett Barr from Think Traffic put it. Join my on my quest?

However, I’ll still be posting each post at 12am midnight. And now, I’ll feel free to write super long posts, or super short ones. But my first two questions to ask myself before I publish the post will be:

Is this epic sh*t?

Will my readers benefit and find value from this post?

New eBook

I am going to go on a guest posting spree soon, so as I write all the posts I am ploanning to come up with more eBooks for the subscribers.

Anyway, the newest eBook recently would be Time is Limited: 6 Steps to More Effective Time Management. It’s not a long eBook but it covers the basics of time management.

It’s more of a guidebook, or an activity book, actually.

Find out more about the VIP Newsletter!

New Categories

I used to stick to only 10 categories last time. Now, I’ve added more, split them (excluding the announcements category) and categorised them into 3 broader categories:

1. Your Life
2. The ‘Inner You’
3. Ready…Set…Go!

I am planning to add more sub-categories in the future when I think  that they are needed. I have put in a sidebar widget listing the categories and sub-categories, so check it out in your free time!

By the way, if you click on some of the categories, each post has ‘double image’. The first is the featured image, then the second is the real image in-line. I am working slowly (I have about 6 projects right now for school!) right now to move these images after the more tag.

(Hopefully) More Comments and More Readers

This is just a ‘hopefully’ bit. I am planning to go on the guest posting spree soon, as I’ve mentioned above.

I’ve actually gathered up a list of blogs in my niche that allows guest posting, and I’ve linked them to a note here. You can see a task at the bottom of the note (rank blogs in other of preferred).

I am going to follow this strategy, once I’ve ranked the blogs:

1. Pitch the top 3 blogs with 3 ideas EACH (no duplicating of ideas)
2. Write the post for those who were accepted
3. Add the blog to a list below of ‘wrote before’ and their respective post so that I can pitch the blogger again later on easily
4. Move on to the next 3
5. Rinse and repeat

If you have any blogs I’ve missed out, feel free to leave a comment below and share!

So thanks so much for reading this post and I hope I’ve ‘enlightened’ you with the changes in GLB.